


luminous.

by scoundrelhan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-16 01:39:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10561240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scoundrelhan/pseuds/scoundrelhan
Summary: Is this what love feels like? She lets herself think, the caverns of her thoughts softening under the echoes of the question





	

_Is this what love feels like?_ She lets herself think, the caverns of her thoughts softening under the echoes of the question. She thinks it again, heart pounding, and wonders in embarrassment if he can hear it - the trembling, unbridled beat - but he's still fiddling with the controls and muttering to himself, unruly hair falling like a curtain against his cheek.

"You just can't take your eyes off me, can you, sweetheart?" He asks, grin peeking through strands of brown overgrown bangs, because he can never let a silence drag on for too long. Or maybe it's just because he wants to get a rise out of her, dig another hole into the center of her big enough for himself so he can poke and prod at her patience.

"Maybe I'm just wondering how I managed to get myself stuck with such an incompetent ass," she says, because this is how they are.

This is how they are: he says something, and she overreacts, and they both shout themselves into oblivion, until they're staring down the barrel of a gun, except it isn't a gun, it's just themselves, wide eyed and too terrified to pull the trigger. She knows they're dancing on coals, always jumping to another spot before they get burned, always deflecting and diverting and twisting away from the truth. And what exactly is the truth? That she loves him, and he can never be someone that will love her back? That there's a war on, and she shouldn't be thinking about the length of his shoulders, or his chipped tooth, or the callouses on his palms? It always comes back to the fact that she knows the shape of his lips on hers. She can't forget something like that, can't just lock it away like she did with the rest of the painful things she wished didn't happen but did. And it had been painful, having all of him against her, teeth clattering together because they were too close, too cramped. She knew the warmth of his body, and the rhythm of his breath, and how can people stand this?

Han just laughs at her, but there's nothing malicious about it, and there's something in his smile like he knows. Like he's known all along. She smiles back, just a little, and that's when the lights flicker back on, a crescendo of engines and wires and mechanical life filling her up. Her heart swells, too big for its cage, and he jumps up from the floor, leans too far into her space.

Kiss me, she thinks. Kiss me again.

"What was that about incompetent ass?"

She rolls her eyes, pushes him away, and he laughs again, roars with it, falls down into his chair with a smile that could outshine the stars surrounding them. This is how they are. She wouldn't have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the inactivity. I've been very busy, as always, and haven't had the time to dedicate towards finishing my other fics. Hope you liked this little snippet I wrote a while ago.


End file.
